Retiring from Driving: A Kinder Way to Give Up the Keys?

Written by Judy Bortman

Part 1 of 2.

My uncle is 87 and still driving. It's a scary thought for his well-being and for those he may encounter on the road. Like many seniors he's downsized and lives in an independent living community. Driving remains a necessity because there are few transit options. Shops and services are nearby, but on a busy road. How long can he safely drive even a short distance? When will it be time to "give up the keys?"

Just as we experienced normal body changes during puberty, aging has its own set of unique changes. Slower reflexes, vision adjustments (longer to focus and adjust to light), diminished hearing and memory lapses.

This leads me to question whether my uncle or any advanced senior is really fit to drive. How do you measure behind the wheel "fitness?" Physical strength, mental alertness, flexibility, visual clarity and rapid reaction times are all required. At some point, family or friends will need to have a heartfelt discussion about when, where and how often a senior can drive safely and what driving limitations are necessary to accommodate aging. Is it time to "give up the keys?"

Some changes to driving habits seem obvious. Say good-by to E-Z pass, only drive during the day, in non-peak times and near home. My uncle has made these adjustments and we’ve discussed the "limited range" of his driving, but I still worry. We're inching closer to the time when he'll need to relinquish the keys altogether. For now that benchmark remains on the horizon but it’s getting closer with each birthday.

According to a new survey released by Liberty Mutual Insurance, the majority of senior drivers are behind the wheel regularly, even those with limited physical abilities. While many seniors are safe drivers, the time will come when they, too, have to confront the reality that it’s time to limit or stop their driving.  

"'Giving up the keys' isn't being addressed by a majority of seniors or their children."

"Only 6 percent of seniors have spoken with someone, typically their children or a doctor, about their driving ability."

-Liberty Mutual Insurance Survey

8,000 Baby Boomers turn 65 every day.

Seniors fear losing their independence, becoming less active, having difficulty finding alternative transportation and feeling isolated. The Liberty Mutual survey revealed that more than half of children with senior parents were concerned about their parents' driving abilities yet nearly one-third avoided initiating the conversation.

According to AARP, members of the Baby Boom generation will be turning 65 at a rate of 8,000 per day until 2030. Soon, one in four drivers will be over 65.

If there's a senior driver in your family, it's never too soon to start the dialogue about giving up the keys. Helpful videos from The Alzheimer’s Association and Liberty Mutual provide specific suggestions of what to say and may help you ease into the conversation.

To my surprise my uncle was more receptive to talking about giving up the keys than I had expected.  If there's a senior driver in your life, start the "tough love" conversation. Don't wait until it’s too late!